GENIUS FORUMS

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Trevor Salyzyn - ...or you know, like a sitcom, where the parents have long annoying arguments through the child, except more real.




strong as i am


father...look in my eyes,
see me as i really am, you made me,
now take me...tell me how it feels now,
behold your flesh has come of age,
forsake me, you break me...

mother...let me heal you,
your pain has lasted far too long
release it...it kills you
see me as i feel you
the love you would not share
grows tired of waiting

strong as i am, there's something about this thing that scares me
strong as i am, there's something about this thing that dares me
strong as i am, there's something about this thing that haunts me
strong as i am, there's something about this thing that taunts me

will i leave them (?), i say no,
they ask me, will you leave us (?)...

i say

no

would i leave you, or discard you, for a moment that
seems beyond us (?)...never would i break this union,
when our love is just...becoming...

you gave me life...i give you

love




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tomas, I loved the poem. It inspired me to try leaving the forum. I failed miserably. It was like trying to quit smoking, except I couldn't do it. Hard to abandon people who've been a surrogate for much of your family.

K, the first note sucks. I've never done an original before, but I'm too lazy to fix it.

Last post, I swear!

I think, if Mick Jagger would have sang it, and his group accompanied it, it would be a good song. In its current state it needs more work, and less painful comparisons with real life.

Trevor: Best of luck, mate.


Tomas: I never got around to asking you this. Do you and your fellow masons rule the world or are all those conspiracy theories just a great way for authors to make money off of books and stuff?


I'll understand if its confidential, and if you respond in your usual way :(

Trevor,

Just for my part, I wouldn't want to see a "QRST" involving you. That would be giving you too little credit. An "RT" (Rowden/Trevor) might work, since that would be two of the better thinkers on this forum. Why throw your lot in with David and Kevin? David is an inflexible ideologue and Kevin is backslidden to the point he doesn't have much of interest to say.

In my mind, "QRS" is basically a historical term of convenience. I'm not sure such a "group" can be said to exist at present in any sensible way.

As for the other thing you mentioned about the "pay-per-view," it's flattering, but I don't argue for entertainment. Confrontational discussions are not enjoyable to me, and I don't give myself any more gray hairs than I feel "called" to do.

Hey Trevor,

That was very pleasant on the ear - I like what you did with it. You're quite the creative musician. I took the liberty of adding a bit of djembe accompaniment to it - I hope that you like what I've done: Ugh with beat.

I reckon that we'd have great jams in person. I'd be very pleased if you changed your mind about not visiting after all.

Cheers,
Laird

I'd be very pleased if you changed your mind about not visiting after all.

He changed his mind? Where, why, when?

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Where: private communications on Facebook.
Why: without Trevor's permission I won't divulge that.
When: yesterday, if I recall correctly.

Too bad that he changed his mind.

The nice thing about changing your mind is that you can always change it back again.

Anybody got a stubby?

Whatever you meant by that, Nat, it whooshed right over the top of my head.

It was intended to be a random ambiguous question. I like to ask such things every so often and see what comes up.

Where is Waldo?

Why, P - does he have the stubby?

He has five hundred stubbies.

And two thousand guitars ready to ROCK.

FTBITTTD!

Sliced Bread.

That kind of thread again, n'est pas?

Enjoyed it, Trevor.

-

Talk of stubby's brings me back.

Days of practicing guitar with a good friend of mine, (also named Trevor).

While listening to 311...

:-)

Unidian wrote:FTBITTTD!

WGTTOPD!

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(i've not had the time to check out a lotta these threads, trevor errr, eliot)


-eliot-
Trevor Salyzyn - tomas, I loved the poem.

-tomas-
Back at ya there, eliot!

Thanks, i'd been thinking of a way to get ya out of your recent funk.




-eliot-
It inspired me to try leaving the forum.

-tomas-
I just find other avenues (as the streets have no name) to call "home" away from home. Few days off for some, and in the case of The Dude, a longer respite. And, in the case of Elizabeth, a bit longer... Hit-n-Git comes to mind :-)




-eliot-
I failed miserably.

-tomas-
Backsliding is permissible :-)




-eliot-
It was like trying to quit smoking,

-tomas-
Well, it's a vile habit (if we're referring to commercial tobacco) and there are no easy ways out, exception being: "cold turkey".




-eliot-
except I couldn't do it.

-tomas-
Took me 20 years to give it up. 35-cents a pack when i started and $1.75 a pack when "i quit". Three packs a day of Marlboro box reds. The one habit (thanks US Army) i kept trying to convince myself i could just quit by 'not buying' anymore. A field of dreams.

(The plan i'd heard about claimed one could rid the nicotine in 3 days)... (i stocked up for 7 days)... What i did, was not eat for 4 days (104 hours actually), drink a gallon of reverse-osmosis water each day, stay in a spare bedroom for 4 days, no computer/tv/radio etc., no human contact whatsoever! i had a 2 shit buckets and 2 piss buckets - 5-gallon variety with lids :-) and... they stayed in the room with me :-) Slept on the floor, no blankets/pillow. No bathing, washing nothing! Breath-Rite nasal inhancers were commercially available as far as i recall at the time :-(

When you commit, you must submit. So, i never looked back when i stepped out of that room. Cleaned out the spare room, took a shower, etc. never thought twice about it. Cause i remembered the morphine-drip addiction after i'd been blasted in VietNam, just gotta move on.

So, haven't lip-touched a commercial cigarette in 12 years come January 2008.

That being said, when i'm back in North Dakota, powwows, Norsk Hostfest, family/class reunions or visit my farm etc., i'll imbibe in some real Native American tobacco... no additives etc. What A Buzz! The hallucinations are outta this world - 2-3 hits all that's necessary. No point going overboard :-) as one can only get so -"high"- in this garden of eden variety is the spice of life thing... called our human shell - the body will go into overload as the perceptory senses tingle.

An old Army buddy transferred into the US Secret Service, when his Army term was up, he ended up now with the contraband Cuban Cigar Division :-) he has jurisdiction when the feds have their "seizure of contraband sales" and he'll send me a Care Package of Cuban stogies. Wow! Thank God (and GeeZus) for America, in those rare instances when Uncle Sam has come in handy :-)




-eliot-
Hard to abandon people who've been a surrogate for much of your family.

-tomas-
Life IS hard!

Can't buy happiness no matter what you do.

Can't get to heaven on roller skates.

Any you most certainly, can-not, take a taxi cab to Timbuktu.

Life is hard.


Furthermore, it's just a matter of 'culling the herd'. Weed out those who cause you aggravation in your thought processes, the brain tolerates so much overload with all the electromagnetic fields present, you know? Staying up most of the night in front of a screen staring/responding to (surrogate family) pixels is no easy task.




Tomas (the tank)
Prince of Jerusalem
16 Degree
Scottish Rite Free Mason




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Tomas wrote:Took me 20 years to give it up. The one habit i kept (thanks Army) trying to convince myself i could just by 'not buying' anymore. A field of dreams.

(The plan i'd heard about claimed one could rid the nicotine in 3 days)... (i stocked up for 7 days)... What i did, was not eat for 4 days (104 hours actually), drink a gallon of reverse-osmosis water each day, stay in a spare bedroom for 4 days, no computer/tv/radio etc., no human contact whatsoever! i had a 2 shit buckets and 2 piss buckets - 5-gallon variety with lids :-) and... they stayed in the room with me :-) Slept on the floor, no blankets/pillow. No bathing, washing nothing! Breath-Rite nasal inhancers were commercially available as far as i recall at the time :-(

When you commit, you must submit. So, i never looked back when i stepped out of that room. Cleaned out the spare room, took a shower, etc. never thought twice about it. Cause i remembered the morphine-drip addiction after i'd been blasted in VietNam, just gotta move on.

So, haven't lip-touched a commercial cigarette in 12 years come January 2008.

A truly inspiring story for overcoming addictions! I will remember this one. It seems obvious to me that the only way to overcome is through will power, not by taking drugs that will make it easier, painless, or require no effort, as the average idiot today wishes.