Satan

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cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

If you two are going to do this here, would it still be gauche to butt in and comment?
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

Ok, well. I just listened to Barrie, an WWII veteran and former police officer tell me about a surgeon who was decapitated in a horrible highway accident, and a teenager who was disemboweled while gripping the handlebars of his motorcyle. I guess my thinking is sufficiently jostled.
Satan wrote:
"But of course, she is innocent. I am far smarter, and I know enough to figure all this out. That itself secures the beastly influence in its place. That is the basis of Biblical free-will. The only person who can subdue the beast, is the one whose mind is afflicted. The more I try to push my point of view on her, the more she hates herself. Of course, when I use allegory like "Satan" it tends to have a much harder impact, but that's the point itself. The truth hurts. We are all Satan in some respect until we've become completely liberated from sin, which is unlikely for anyone. At this point, she tends to think I'm playing the superiority card, because I'm wiser to this game than she is. She may glimpse what its all really about, but she gets stuck on feeling inferior to me. She doesn't want to accept a world-view where I am so much wiser. But she enjoys imparting her wisdom on me. "
I didn't mind having that view as you can see above in my email from a year ago. I do need to figure it out on my own and not submit to an authority anyways. My main problem arises with you not doing the very things you are telling me to do. If the actions aren't matching the words, I'm not going along. Well the words confuse me for awhile and then I catch back on, apparently. I am not imparting any wisdom as you clearly think and state I'm incapable, which would then make it so. You also aren't considering what I say and others because you are too busy imparting. Maybe you and the Jehovah witness guy have such great conversations because you both are trying to impart/convert and not actually talking. Neither of you are serious about changing your own view but both seeking to change the other.
Yea, something in me wants to hear the other person say; Humans suffer from an illusion of self-subsistence that has its origins in the very foundations of conscious experience, each and everyone of us must turn on ourselves and make a conscious effort to explore the recesses of our sub-conscious minds in order to stop ourselves from distorting the truth. And when someone doesn't appear to grasp this, by never alluding to it, implying it or explicitly stating it, I have a tendency to want to ignore them as if they were talking about Folk Psychology. Which it usually happens to boil down to. I'm not even satisfied with formal academic psychology, why would I be interested in Folk psychology or the whimsical musings of someone who could care less about what is actually true. I tend to pick a time to walk away, a bit harder to do with it is your girlfriend. Instead, I tell her she is wrong, worse mistake maybe....
You accuse Donna of the same, but don't mention your difficulties in not preaching to people. You don't mention your difficulties in not getting upset when people don't respond to your well drawn out ideas. You have a serious need to be heard and acknowledged that has a lot of problems. You get angry at people for not doing it when you want. Part of the reason for your post to Donna was that you spent a long time composing an argument for her and she was too hung up on her own ego and accomplishments to look at what you are saying. You said as much to me a week ago, kind of agitated. You get agitated at the entire board when no one responds and agitated at facebook and the people on there as well. I stay up until 1-2am to listen to you and if i try to go to bed, I don't care about the truth. I do, but I still need to fetch water and chop wood the next day and you certainly aren't running at the sleep deficit I am. It doesn't help me handle situations objectively and I'm too tired to search inward when I do have time to myself, a lot of the time.
I think I've lamented my inability to communicate effectively many times. But not in this particular thread, it wasn't really the point I was trying to make. Nor was I trying to say that you are nothing but Satanic. Fact is I could have used anyone to make the same point, and probably should have used Guy Ritchie's Revolver if I had thought of it at the time.

"See, now, this is the thing. I came home last night after work at 12:00AM. I brought some Alleve at my girlfriends request. I ran out of work earlier in the night to get it and some mouthwash for her. When I got home, she was sleeping, but I went to give her the Alleve and say goodnight to her. Normally I come to bed a few hours later, so I'm not crashing as soon as I get home. The other thing is I take Nexium for the acid and bile problem I have and I forgot to take it yesterday. Another thing I had to do was medicate my cat with Tetracycline for Chlamydia. It needs to be done 3 times a day and she was due. I've pretty much been doing all that chore myself too. So, I didn't stick around, I went to medicate myself and Lila (the cat). Then I replied to this thread and read a few chapters of A History of God by Karen Armstrong. When I went to bed, I set the alarm for 8:15AM. She works at 10AM, and I have to get up to drive her to work since she was in an accident totaling her vehicle. The accident happened on monday and she is pretty stiff, hence the Alleve. When I went to bed she tossed and turned, looked at me a few times with contempt, said some things that seemed pointless until finally complaining "I wish you would think to give me a massage when I need it." and I thought aloud "Or you could just ask me kindly to give you a massage and I would do it, instead of expecting me to have it mind already." and this went to her saying "Well, if you loved me you would think about these things. I just had an accident and I'm stiff, you should be thinking about me." to which I argued "I do think about you, but I can't reasonably be expected to do so all the time, or to always focus on what you need." to which she retorts "But I give you everything you need." and I "You don't really give the most essential things that I would benefit from. You do minute tasks for me here and there, just as I do for you. But in terms of venerating Truth and making that a part of your focus, you don't really." To which she claimed "I spent 40 hours reading stuff that you wrote trying to understand it." and I said "But you don't really understand it or why it is so prominent in my mind. In other words you aren't equipped to be truly empathic to me and the existentialist dilemmas I face, but expect me to drop them whenever you have a stubbed toe or a tense shoulder." to which she said "I was just in an accident." and I "That was three days ago, and I've given you a few massages and attended to you in many other ways." and she "Oh, you brought me Alleve, big deal."

Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears. ~Marcus Aurelius
as copy and pasted from you Ryan.

I am to be empathetic to his stomach/health issues and his existentialist dilemmas, but he can't be empathetic that I am working my ass off and was in a car accident? How come, it's assumed that I don't have any existentialist dilemmas that he is to be empathetic to? I try to talk about them, but because my examples include work or other things, he just sees it as me whining about work.

Notice this as well:
A few weeks ago she got into a car accident and one night she dissapointedly rolled over in bed to say "I wish you would think to give me a massage when I am hurting." and I thought this was pretty demanding. She restated "No, I just wish you would." and I said "It still sounds like you are disappointed in me, as if its something I 'should' have thought of. The fact is, I've maybe received one massage in my whole life, and I've spent most of my life alone so massages just aren't a big part of my consciousness. It doesn't occur to me to get or give a massage. I just deal with muscle tension by enduring it." and she "But I was just in an accident!" and I "I understand, but that alone doesn't ensure the notion arises in my mind, if you want a massage kindly ask and I'll give you one." "But I shouldn't have to ask you, you should be concerned enough about me!" Finally I said "I wish you would show some excitement at some of the truths I uncover in my studies, you don't seem to show much excitement at ideas at all." and she "I'm sorry your ideas don't blow me away." and I "They aren't 'my' ideas, they are ideas or truths in abstraction, I don't want you to be blown away by 'my' ideas, I want you to understand them yourself, know them to be true and I wish you would feel some excitement at the same time, but you don't, and it's not up to you to fulfill that wish for me, but I think it would be in your best interest if you took truth a bit more seriously."
The story changed, things get added and deleted, as to be expected. But he skews the story to make whatever point he wants using me as the example. At first is was that I wasn't empathetic to his human condition, and in the second it was because I wasn't excited by the truths he was uncovering. I told you, he has a ton. It would be in your best interest if you took truth a bit more seriously too. I was actually coming to terms with the fact that you will never think to give me a massage. I've told you as much. I am tired and sore after running around all day, then I have to come home and shovel the lane because you can't and you won't ever think to give me a massage or offer. I realized if you aren't going to when I've been in a car accident and you are picking me up painkiller, then is it not coming to mind any time soon. It was clear to me, that desire had to die. I was accepting that was the reality of the situation, that was it's last breath, an utterance of, I wish you would, but an underlying thinking of I accept that you won't. He then assumed that I am trying to say he doesn't love me, wrong assumption, I correct immediately, only to be told that I don't take truth seriously because I don't feel empathetic towards the pain of his existence. He wants my empathy while not being empathetic to me at all. I get that loving unconditionally means that I keep having empathy for him even though he is unable to for me. Usually that is fine, but when I look for it with all these things is a row, it's been insane, he still isn't capable, and that is the stark reality.

It is true, there is lots that I do not get or embody myself, but each day brings a new reality. What I have been doing that shows the most that I am caught in egoism (outside of my outbursts, obviously) is changing myself instead of pushing back. That caused a lot of problems, and is not in the pursuit of truth. No longer will I bend or accept the tactics. If I have to move or leave, so be it. I need to be able to breathe. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3SxCph5I1Q

1
5 “If your brother or sister[a] sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. 16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’[c] 17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector."
I figured at this point these forums are as close to a church community as he has. So I will leave him in your hands as he might listen to you.

I do love you Ryan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uizQVriWp8M
Peace


I can be incredibly empathetic, but some people desire empathy too much. I was in a horrible accident as a child that nearly cost my life and never, to this day, have I felt any true empathy. Most people, including yourself, pass it off as a one-off incident and proceed to make demands from me as if I should be able to satisfy them. In my autobiography I am working on, I've clearly written how after my accident I was psychologically messed up and still the typical demands were made on me. I didn't know who I was at the age of 7, but I still had to do well in school, and I still had to stay our of trouble or go to jail for my misbehaviour. You must realize that the empathy towards me was so low as to be almost non-existent. I was a "problem" for my community to "solve" and not an individual worthy of empathy. Since that time it has been very difficult for me to empathetic towards other people, especially when their grievances are anything less than a near-fatal motor vehicle accident. And even when they suffer such an accident, I'm not likely to be the high-flung emotional type that is going to sit with you while you dwell on the pain. I learned nice and young that all my pain is solely mind, whether it be physical or psychological, ultimately nobody is going to help, nobody could help and its not like anybody could possibly care that much. But I don't mention this to elevate myself to some level of "having it the worst" it just has more to do with dead-connections in my brain that makes me completely insensitive and unempathetic to all but the worst possible circumstances. When someone is droning on about a stubbed toe, it irritates me, nobody wants to hear me drone on about having my face split open and permeated with gravel.

Or about the ensuing problems I had adapting to normal social life that resulted in the vast majority of my peers hating me and some going as far as to want to kill me. No one wants to hear about how I failed to succeed in school because I couldn't find any reason to live, but at the time those around me just wanted me to play the part and study. I couldn't study after what I'd experienced. Nor did anyone want to hear about the people who were harassing me, beating me up (sometimes in the middle of class) and threatening to kill me. Instead I got expelled from school for carrying a knife for self-defense.

Like I say, from the age of 7, to the age of 17, not a damn thing happened in my life that would normally be counted as positive. Every day of my life was a thousand times worse than any sore toe. So, yes, I'm a bit insensitive when it comes to what other people like to complain about ad nauseam. I try my hardest to be empathetic when someone feels bummed out, but quite honestly, if I go too much into that it will end up coming back to my childhood and I will be the one complaining about life. I'd rather just recognize that most complaints are petty and ignore them.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:If you two are going to do this here, would it still be gauche to butt in and comment?
I give you permission to address me with criticism. Thanks for asking.
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

Animus wrote:I can be incredibly empathetic, but some people desire empathy too much. I was in a horrible accident as a child that nearly cost my life and never, to this day, have I felt any true empathy.
If you have never felt any true empathy, how do you know you can be incredibly empathetic?
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:
Animus wrote:I can be incredibly empathetic, but some people desire empathy too much. I was in a horrible accident as a child that nearly cost my life and never, to this day, have I felt any true empathy.
If you have never felt any true empathy, how do you know you can be incredibly empathetic?
Fair enough question. Although I think there is a difference here between empathy coming in and going out. I am empathic by means of understanding and facilitating. As a child I may have had parents, siblings, doctors, teachers and so forth who were empathic with respect to temporarily entertaining what it must have been/be like. But those people then turned around to their normal expectations and failed to regard my situation. Their version of empathy was fleeting and broke down generally to the idea of them feeling crappy for a few minutes. On the whole though, it did nothing for me when they proceeded to completely misunderstand me. If someone is complaining about something solely for the sake of complaining, I admit to not being very empathic, I'm more or less annoyed.
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

But those people then turned around to their normal expectations and failed to regard my situation.
What would this situation have looked like to a third person?
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:
But those people then turned around to their normal expectations and failed to regard my situation.
What would this situation have looked like to a third person?
That really depends on the "third person" and their perspective on reality. At the time people had the same self-contradictory views they do now. "There is nothing wrong with his brain so he must be choosing to be this way." They did not know that a seven year old brain does not have a functioning prefrontal cortex like our average adult. It is not capable of higher-order cognitive functions. It hasn't reached the "age of reason".

There were individuals that I cam in contact with who were more empathetic, but these meetings were so fleeting as to be imperceptible to my young mind. Also bear in mind that at seven years old, and even at 16 years old, I did not have well-formed theories of reality or in-depth knowledge of the human nervous system. Nor should it have been expected of me to ascend to such heights. I largely played the victim in my circumstances as too did the people I interacted with. Very few of them set aside their own egos to pay attention to a person like me. They were too busy worrying about themselves. The whole story doesn't justify my early victim mentality, it is merely meant to illustrate a lack of sensitivity due to the degree of sensitivity I had to adapt to. Just like the times I don't think to give people a massage, I feel no impetus to be empathetic to a stubbed toe. It doesn't grab my consciousness as something worth paying attention to. I stub my own toe, say "Aw shit!" and then walk it off. That's it. I don't want anyone to pay any attention to it, it's just a visceral response to the pain stimuli and its gone. The pain might linger, but consciously it doesn't hold much importance. That is probably how I have managed to just about kill myself with poor diet. When my sickness comes up, I don't think the gravity of it is really conveyed, I've seen my life flash before my eyes on several occasions as I am gasping for air because my epiglottis is blocked from upswelling bile. I got to this point by largely ignoring my bodies indicators, like a sudden feeling of having the life-force sucked out from under me. Afterwards I'd go straight back to whatever I was doing and say or think no more about it. I'm not just insensitive to other's pain, but also my own to the point of nearly dying from malnutrition and nicotine addiction.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

I would like to add that there is something about my experience of pain that feels like "grounding in reality."

When someone passes me a hot plate and says "careful its hot" I may hold it directly under the hot spot and not react to the pain sensation. The sensation does not make me want to pull away unless it is to the heat of melting my skin, otherwise it feels "solid", "real" and I'm sort of drawn to it.

This reminds me of supermasochist Bob Flanagan who in early childhood came down with a fatal case of cystic fibrosis and had to undergo many painful treatments up until his death. He 'miraculously' survived CF until adulthood at which time he had become a "supermasochist" who got his greatest pleasure from experiencing pain and performing live shows hammering nails through his testicles. I can kind of understand where Bob was coming from, but I've never gone that far in embracing the sensation of pain.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

I should say on occasion "third persons" did see things quite differently. During my stay in the psychiatric ward I was eventually released because one doctor in particular didn't think I should be there and signed the release forms. Meanwhile my parents, my doctors, psychologists and probation officer all thought I should be there. He must have recognized that the one thing that was really bothering me was a sense of feeling trapped, of being controlled from the outside. Immediately after my accident I began rejecting all forms of authority. At 8 years old I packed a backpack said "Fuck you" to my parents and attempted to high-tail it out of there but ended up getting into a wrestling match with my father. My father would later remark "I just can't believe how strong you were and how hard it was to keep you under control. You were only eight years old!" my father overlooked just how much adrenaline and testosterone was coursing through my veins during those years. I had the desire and often felt like I could muster up the strenghth to split the earth in two. Yet, the only time this happened was when I wasn't left to my own devices and a significant pressure was put on me to behave in a specific manner.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

This guy Barrie I mentioned earlier handed me three Legion mags to look through today. I came across some articles on grief and post-traumatic stress disorder.

With respect to grieving at Remembrance Day ceremonies:

"If they want to go and want to participate, they should try to go," even if it causes an emotional response, he says. Such a reaction is normal, and for most people the feeling of anxiety and sadness will pass, particularly if they talk about it with someone close. "Over time, it will get less and less."
Preparing yourself for an emotional reaction may ease things. "Expecting some anxiety may be helpful," says Sareen. "The best way to deal with distress is to accept the distress, remind yourself that you are not weak, and talk about it with family or friends, if you feel like it." If you don't feel like talking that's normal, too. "Everybody has their own individual way of coping."
"I would really highly recommend that people not take emotional symptoms as a sign of either weakness or of need for care," says Sareen. Although distressing at the time, particularly if unexpected, reacting emotionally is entirely normal.


Okay, so if this is normal for post-war adult veterans to experience periods of "sleep disturbance, loss of appetite, depression, even flashbacks to traumatic experiences." I had many of these symptoms and by and large the responsibility to deal with them was pushed back on to me, when I was a child. Admittedly they tried doing what is suggested above and it did nothing for me. Honestly, all I needed was a little space, which I eventually got.
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

Animus wrote:
cousinbasil wrote:If you two are going to do this here, would it still be gauche to butt in and comment?
I give you permission to address me with criticism. Thanks for asking.
But do you not see this exposes Satan to criticsm as well?
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:
Animus wrote:
cousinbasil wrote:If you two are going to do this here, would it still be gauche to butt in and comment?
I give you permission to address me with criticism. Thanks for asking.
But do you not see this exposes Satan to criticsm as well?
Not necessarily, you can easily pick on me. Lots of people find ways to do it. It seems to me though that "Satan" came here to defend herself. This environment is the place to do it in I've always sort of maintained that. You have to be psychological sadomasochistic or enlightened to survive here, and I'm not sure what the difference is.
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

Animus wrote:It seems to me though that "Satan" came here to defend herself.
Because she felt threatened or that she was being attacked. Usually when one defends oneself, it is because one is forced to do so.
You have to be psychological sadomasochistic or enlightened to survive here, and I'm not sure what the difference is.
So far Satan seems like she is neither one, which means she has been forced - by you - into a place where she may not survive.

Satan is not your problem. You are. There are things you can control and there are things you cannot. Start with one thing and get it under control. I'll give you a game plan - the order of the things is not important, so I'm just picking one. Quit smoking. Start with that. It will be incredibly difficult, but don't give up. If you crack and buy a pack, quit again. Each time you try to quit and fail is valuable, whether you know it or not. This is because you aren't giving up. Sooner or later - it could be days, or it could be months - the mere thought of going through withdrawal will be enough to keep you from smoking. In the meantime, you and Satan can blame your withdrawals for any bad blood between you. The truth is, with cigarettes, it is a remarkably short time when taken in perspective. Suddenly, you will have stretches of time where you are doing something - anything - and you will not be interrupted by the "smoke break." Your senses of smell and taste will be be revived. And you will find other uses for a couple $G's a year. Your insides will begin to fight back. Cigarettes are not like crack or heroin - there is no initial upside. You "get" something up front with cocaine and smack. If addictive drugs are like buying on credit where you get the goodies first and pay later, cigarettes are like the debt without ever having the goodies. You won't miss them.

You might be thinking cousinbasil is changing the subject. Au contraire; what you and Satan have presented so far is largely a normal relationship between two imperfect people. Satan sounds quite lucid to me. If you dismiss my game plan, it means you haven't tried it. Take the focus off yourselves and find a common enemy. The theme I sense from you is that you understand but do not feel understood yourself. I had no physical trauma like an accident in my youth, yet I often feel that way. So what? Can you say welcome to the human race? I think your feeling trapped was really that you felt betrayed, you felt vulnerable at a time when many people take feeling secure for granted. You felt powerless - they were supposed to protect me and they didn't but I still have to live with them. You needed to get control, because if they weren't going to do it, you had to.

You still have to try to understand others even if they do not understand you. Try not to make Satan jump through hoops. You are quite right, sir: "There is a difference here between empathy coming in and going out." Try not to anger Satan - if you play with fire, you might get your eye burned. (?)
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:
Animus wrote:It seems to me though that "Satan" came here to defend herself.
Because she felt threatened or that she was being attacked. Usually when one defends oneself, it is because one is forced to do so.
You have to be psychological sadomasochistic or enlightened to survive here, and I'm not sure what the difference is.
So far Satan seems like she is neither one, which means she has been forced - by you - into a place where she may not survive.

Satan is not your problem. You are. There are things you can control and there are things you cannot. Start with one thing and get it under control. I'll give you a game plan - the order of the things is not important, so I'm just picking one. Quit smoking. Start with that. It will be incredibly difficult, but don't give up. If you crack and buy a pack, quit again. Each time you try to quit and fail is valuable, whether you know it or not. This is because you aren't giving up. Sooner or later - it could be days, or it could be months - the mere thought of going through withdrawal will be enough to keep you from smoking. In the meantime, you and Satan can blame your withdrawals for any bad blood between you. The truth is, with cigarettes, it is a remarkably short time when taken in perspective. Suddenly, you will have stretches of time where you are doing something - anything - and you will not be interrupted by the "smoke break." Your senses of smell and taste will be be revived. And you will find other uses for a couple $G's a year. Your insides will begin to fight back. Cigarettes are not like crack or heroin - there is no initial upside. You "get" something up front with cocaine and smack. If addictive drugs are like buying on credit where you get the goodies first and pay later, cigarettes are like the debt without ever having the goodies. You won't miss them.

You might be thinking cousinbasil is changing the subject. Au contraire; what you and Satan have presented so far is largely a normal relationship between two imperfect people. Satan sounds quite lucid to me. If you dismiss my game plan, it means you haven't tried it. Take the focus off yourselves and find a common enemy. The theme I sense from you is that you understand but do not feel understood yourself. I had no physical trauma like an accident in my youth, yet I often feel that way. So what? Can you say welcome to the human race? I think your feeling trapped was really that you felt betrayed, you felt vulnerable at a time when many people take feeling secure for granted. You felt powerless - they were supposed to protect me and they didn't but I still have to live with them. You needed to get control, because if they weren't going to do it, you had to.

You still have to try to understand others even if they do not understand you. Try not to make Satan jump through hoops. You are quite right, sir: "There is a difference here between empathy coming in and going out." Try not to anger Satan - if you play with fire, you might get your eye burned. (?)
What would this situation have looked like to a third person?
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

I asked you first!
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:I asked you first!
Can you provide any evidence for your claims?
What does the scientific community think about it?
What you suggest is intriguing and I don't think any human being would deny it, so why haven't I heard of it before?
Is there something you are missing?
Unfortunately I can't comment, because I do not have the confidence in myself to pass any judgment on your claims.

(Cut a script from an 'atheist' tha other day)
cousinbasil
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Re: Satan

Post by cousinbasil »

In your own words, of course
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

cousinbasil wrote:
Animus wrote:It seems to me though that "Satan" came here to defend herself.
Because she felt threatened or that she was being attacked. Usually when one defends oneself, it is because one is forced to do so.
Maybe, but this time she could have let you think whatever you want about her, all you know of her is as "my girlfriend." and you knew nothing else of her except what I had said. The indirect way the knowledge was coming to you left plenty of room for you to doubt it, now with her here she can directly give an account of herself.
So far Satan seems like she is neither one, which means she has been forced - by you - into a place where she may not survive.
I didn't bring her here, I brought "my girlfriend" here, Amanda Lahay arrived on her own.
Satan is not your problem. You are. There are things you can control and there are things you cannot. Start with one thing and get it under control. I'll give you a game plan - the order of the things is not important, so I'm just picking one. Quit smoking. Start with that. It will be incredibly difficult, but don't give up. If you crack and buy a pack, quit again. Each time you try to quit and fail is valuable, whether you know it or not. This is because you aren't giving up. Sooner or later - it could be days, or it could be months - the mere thought of going through withdrawal will be enough to keep you from smoking. In the meantime, you and Satan can blame your withdrawals for any bad blood between you. The truth is, with cigarettes, it is a remarkably short time when taken in perspective. Suddenly, you will have stretches of time where you are doing something - anything - and you will not be interrupted by the "smoke break." Your senses of smell and taste will be be revived. And you will find other uses for a couple $G's a year. Your insides will begin to fight back. Cigarettes are not like crack or heroin - there is no initial upside. You "get" something up front with cocaine and smack. If addictive drugs are like buying on credit where you get the goodies first and pay later, cigarettes are like the debt without ever having the goodies. You won't miss them.

You might be thinking cousinbasil is changing the subject. Au contraire; what you and Satan have presented so far is largely a normal relationship between two imperfect people. Satan sounds quite lucid to me. If you dismiss my game plan, it means you haven't tried it. Take the focus off yourselves and find a common enemy. The theme I sense from you is that you understand but do not feel understood yourself. I had no physical trauma like an accident in my youth, yet I often feel that way. So what? Can you say welcome to the human race? I think your feeling trapped was really that you felt betrayed, you felt vulnerable at a time when many people take feeling secure for granted. You felt powerless - they were supposed to protect me and they didn't but I still have to live with them. You needed to get control, because if they weren't going to do it, you had to.

You still have to try to understand others even if they do not understand you. Try not to make Satan jump through hoops. You are quite right, sir: "There is a difference here between empathy coming in and going out." Try not to anger Satan - if you play with fire, you might get your eye burned. (?)
Honestly, I'm not going to reply to this, sorry you spent your time on it.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

Animus wrote:a place where she may not survive.
I dunno, is that a factual thing, you think? She has always maintained with me that she is honest and truthful, then she should survive here. But I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't stick around, I told you, she doesn't like this place.
Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

I shouldn't have used my girlfriend as an example of Satan/Egoism. There are plenty of examples to draw from and she is not that bad. I used her because we were arguing earlier in the day and it seemed convenient to reflect on our exchanges. My apologies for portraying her one-sidedly, she is a great woman!
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Tomas
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Re: Satan

Post by Tomas »

Animus wrote:I shouldn't have used my girlfriend as an example of Satan/Egoism. There are plenty of examples to draw from and she is not that bad. I used her because we were arguing earlier in the day and it seemed convenient to reflect on our exchanges. My apologies for portraying her one-sidedly, she is a great woman!
Too late, sweetie. Cat's outta the bag. There'll be hell to pay on the home front.

On the up side, Satan (and his posse) haven't been cast, as yet, into the hellfires. Still the 3&1/2 year Tribulation, The Final Judgment and a couple other things that the bible says will happen. If it's in the bible .. it must be true!

PS - Donna (Mensa) will fill you in on those 'other things'.
Don't run to your death
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Tomas
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Re: Satan

Post by Tomas »

-Satan rightly observes-
He then goes on Genius Forums and says: Her response has way more to do with our personal relationship than it has to do with the point I was making. But I notice how it ties many threads together into a gross justification for lazying around on the couch watching David Attenborough while claiming to be performing spiritual work."

-tomas-
No doubt. He's addicted to marijuana.


-Satan continues-
Where is the benefit of the doubt? Fact: I've only watched 5x45minute episodes in the last 2 months of nature programming. I put it on sometimes to pass out to. Sometimes they get me thinking other times I pass out.

-tomas-
Find his stash of weed and flush the stuff down the stool.


-Satan further states-
He also neglects that I would be watching something else, but I am specifically watching those because he expressed he is not interested. So instead of us watching things were both interested in separately we try to watch those together. Where is the pursuit of truth? I pointed out an inconsistency and you get hung up that I wasn't directly responding to what you said. You stop responding to me there and go and complain about me where you think I am not reading saying I don't get truth because I keep relating it back to you and I?

-tomas-
While you're rounding up his pot, check for his 'roach motel' .. the marijuana butts he keeps around when his dope supplier isn't around.


-Satan-
I'm just pointing out the inconsistency, it has nothing to do with our relationship. This sort of pointing out is usually is accompanied by a rise of Satan and that indeed is what happened when you came here.

-tomas-
Oh yeah, typical smearing tactic of a serial loser, "blame the woman". (as he says, she's a great woman!) Yawn, how inspiring.


-Satan see through the charlatan-
He really isn't depicting truth in his posts or giving me the benefit of the doubt at all. Yes, I wasn't addressing his thread. I was addressing the inconsistency. He says, he wants people to call him and point out these things, he is open to criticism, yet is not. He avoided my criticism, as he avoided Elizabeth Isabel (sorry he told me your name before, but I can't recall right now.)

-tomas-
Honey, when this Neanderthal comes down out of his drug stupor, all the reminders in the world will not jar his memory of the past day. He's been in denial since he's been at Genius Forums. He brags about smoking 3 joints a day. He's a common drug addict.

PS - If at wits end, call the cops and have the drug dogs find all his hiding places. He needs to lose his crutches before he can grow as a man. You are living with a boy who refuses to grow up.
Don't run to your death
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

Thomas you never fail to amuse

Fact is, if I quit smoking marijuana, and thus quit acquiring it from my sources, "Satan" would have nothing to smoke herself and it wouldn't be long before the both of us were pretty crabby. I'd probably compensate by smoking more cigarettes, she'd either go back to smoking cigarettes or increase the amount she drinks (like start drinking on weekdays).

I don't know if you know anything about addiction, but both of us have been dealing with it for a while.

I don't remember "bragging" about smoking marijuana, for the most part I've declined to mention it and when I have I've spelled out the harmful effects of it and discouraged it.
PS - If at wits end, call the cops and have the drug dogs find all his hiding places. He needs to lose his crutches before he can grow as a man. You are living with a boy who refuses to grow up.
I don't have any stashes. I keep my bag of weed out on the coffee table all the time except when we have company. "Satan" usually leaves hers out. "Satan" usually has 3 or 4 bags of weed stashed throughout the house.
While you're rounding up his pot, check for his 'roach motel' .. the marijuana butts he keeps around when his dope supplier isn't around.
That's why I have two suppliers who both deliver, they are pretty much always around. And anyway, "Satan" has given me weed when I run out so I don't resort to smoking roaches.

Now, is it time to talk about Thomas' addiction to being a douche?
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

Animus
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Re: Satan

Post by Animus »

We had a pretty lengthy conversation in which we both expressed our concerns over this. One of the things she asked me for was a public apology, recognizing that I had erred I agreed to make the apology which is what you are ridiculing Thomas. I would have liked an apology too, from someone, sometime in my life, never happens... Although I am used to being painted black and labeled, I personally know that it is fallacious, originating from the minds of naive egotists. However, at times it can be wearisome. For example, when I was a child the statement "brain dead" circulated about me quite frequently, as an adult it is mainly "Psychopath" or "Sociopath" which is what "Satan" has been labeling me along with my brother, sister and her friends.

Ironically, there are occasionally people on the other side of the fence, like my co-worker Ted who maintains "She sounds just like my first wife! She was always in need of something, she always had a major grievance, and I could never satisfy her. It took me 12 years to figure out that she was never going to be satisfied because she hadn't grown up yet. Some women are just little girls." Similarly, I heard from my mother (who previously warned 'Satan' about my past anger-management issues) a very similar story, that 'Satan' sounds like she is eternally unsatisfied with anything I do. Satan herself labeled herself "co-dependency" which entails much of that kind of behavior. I make a genuine effort not to label her anything and accept these as one-sided, ego-bound, supporting statements which I largely avoid/ignore, but recognize the reality and identify ways I can help. Me? Well, I'm just a brain dead, psychopathic neanderthal, what the fuck would I need care, concern, compassions, sympathy, empathy or understanding for?
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