Genius Academy

[Laird]

As the newest and most spiritually advanced member of the QRS*T* quaternity, I have the honour of announcing a new initiative in the Propagation of Wisdom: Genius Academy. I have not yet discussed this with my colleagues but I know that as fellow Enlightened Men with Perfectly Developed Reasoning Abilities, they will be able to logically prove this Academy for themselves.

Genius Academy will train people of all ages in the art of Reasoning, The Spiritual Path, and Wisdom in general. Primarily, however, it will focus upon young children around the age of seven, as this is when the mind is most curious, plastic and amenable to appropriate misguidance. The primary process employed by the school will be the fostering of conditions conducive to thinking: namely, suffering, isolation and idleness. Its motto will be "Work it out for yourself". Children will not be "taught" anything in the traditional academic sense of the word: rather they will be placed in situations in which they learn for themselves. For example, one method of learning will be to remove children one at a time to the deserts of Central Australia without food and water but with books explaining how to acquire those precious commodities in that environment. The child will thus logically prove to itself how to read.

A common mistake made by those to whom I describe this new venture is to assume that the texts of this Academy will quite naturally be those unparalleled works: "Poison for the Heart", "Wisdom of the Infinite", and "Woman: an Exposition for the Advancing Mind". Absolutely not: the finest spiritual progress requires that the child rely not on the words of others but that it prove Ultimate Truth for itself. To this end, the remainder of the education of the child will consist of a Zen-like mantra: "What is the nature of Ultimate Reality?" A child will not be released from its suffering and isolation until it has at least logically proven the answer to this question. It may obtain a doctorate in Studies of Ultimate Reality should it furthermore logically prove that it has arrived at a state of total absence of delusion, even if only momentarily. Marks will be deducted from those children who exhibit any form of emotion.

I trust that you are excited about this latest QRS*T* endeavour. I am not, having dropped all such notions several hours ago.

Now I open up this thread to offers of contribution to this cause: some, but very little money, is required, however more important is transportation. Those with cars and buses are encouraged to donate some of their travelling resources for the transportation of children to the places of suffering most conducive to their spiritual progress.

[Dan Rowden]

Dude, I'll allow you one of these threads in the main forum, but not two.

[Imadrongo]

Sounds like a slightly harsher version of Sunday School that is not limited to Sundays, assuming the children will be fully immersed in QRS*T* wisdom.

[hsandman]

when the mind is most curious, plastic and amenable to appropriate misguidance. The primary process employed by the school will be the fostering of conditions conducive to thinking: namely, suffering, isolation and idleness. Its motto will be "Work it out for yourself". Children will not be "taught" anything in the traditional academic sense of the word: rather they will be placed in situations in which they learn for themselves. For example, one method of learning will be to remove children one at a time to the deserts of Central Australia without food and water but with books explaining how to acquire those precious commodities in that environment. The child will thus logically prove to itself how to read.

Sounds like a slightly harsher version of Sunday School that is not limited to Sundays, assuming the children will be fully immersed in QRS*T* wisdom.

Neil: How old are you? I am no shrink, but I think you are sociopath. :-(

[Dan Rowden]

Sounds like a slightly harsher version of Sunday School that is not limited to Sundays, assuming the children will be fully immersed in QRS*T* wisdom.

No, they will be fully immersed in Alpaca semen. Surely you've heard of its wondrous enlightening properties? I mean, don't the folk of the Andes look like the most contentedly wise people you've ever seen?

Though, I may have that story the wrong way around. I'm not sure.

[Imadrongo]

I am 20. This sounds like the QRS version of Sunday school.

He said Australia, the Andes don't go there do they??

[Dan Rowden]

No, but we have Alpaca farms. Don't you?

[Imadrongo]

Nope. :-S I thought those were in SA only lol.

[Jason]

Sounds like a slightly harsher version of Sunday School that is not limited to Sundays, assuming the children will be fully immersed in QRS*T* wisdom.

No, they will be fully immersed in Alpaca semen. Surely you've heard of its wondrous enlightening properties?

Ahh yes, it goes back to the etymological roots of "seer" which was a contraction of the original "semen", literally a combination of "see" and "men"(in the grand masculinist tradition.)

[Laird]

Dude, I'll allow you one of these threads in the main forum, but not two.

Wise words indeed Dan. Spiritual abundance can be overwhelming to the novice - better that we split this thread out into Worldly Matters.

[Dan Rowden]

Yes, we don't want people's heads exploding from overabundance.

[Shahrazad]

Or from laughing too hard and too loud.

[Dan Rowden]

Well, it's too late for some of us, obviously. I know that looks like Laird's hair, but it's actually neural pathways and synapses. If you turn off the lights you'll find his head actually glows in the dark.

[Philosophaster]

For example, one method of learning will be to remove children one at a time to the deserts of Central Australia without food and water but with books explaining how to acquire those precious commodities in that environment. The child will thus logically prove to itself how to read.

Hahahaha.

[Jason]

For example, one method of learning will be to remove children one at a time to the deserts of Central Australia without food and water but with books explaining how to acquire those precious commodities in that environment.

ATSIC and Centrelink literature no doubt.

[Trevor Salyzyn]

Dan,

Well, it's too late for some of us, obviously. I know that looks like Laird's hair, but it's actually neural pathways and synapses. If you turn off the lights you'll find his head actually glows in the dark.

If there was only a way to harness that unimaginable power, like shaving his head while he's asleep.

[Trevor Salyzyn]

Jason,

ATSIC and Centrelink literature no doubt.

I hope you're not taking Laird seriously!

[clyde]

Laird;

Not that you (or I) care, but your "new initiative in the Propagation of Wisdom" is disappointing. I expected better of you.

clyde

[Trevor Salyzyn]

clyde,

Not that you (or I) care, but your "new initiative in the Propagation of Wisdom" is disappointing. I expected better of you.

Why do expect anything of him at all? He's a fucking grease-stain.

[Laird]

Not that you (or I) care, but your "new initiative in the Propagation of Wisdom" is disappointing. I expected better of you.

Clyde, expectations are the realm of the spiritually ignorant, as is disappointment. That you are unable to perceive the Genius in this initiative speaks only to the dreadful chasm that separates you from the Enlightened Ones. But, pray tell, how would you do better?

[clyde]

Laird;

As you know, expectations and disappointments come and go as causality determines, so there is no need to create an imaginary chasm.

Since I do not believe that you're are actually going to create a "Genius Academy" as you described, tell me what you are actually going to do.

clyde

[The Dude]

Yeah, pray tell. How the fuck are you going to convince people that, you know, suffering isn't bad?

Give a child a lollipop, then yank it away, spit on it and dip it in the sandbox, and tell them to figure out how to still get to the tasty treat! You know, you can be a real ass sometimes.

[ChaoticMelody]

Haven't you gotten bored yet Laird?

[The Dude]

CM wrote:

Haven't you gotten bored yet Laird?

Yeah, grow up Laird. Stop believing yourself.

[Laird]

Since I do not believe that you're are actually going to create a "Genius Academy" as you described, tell me what you are actually going to do.

Clyde, Genius Academy is but the start of an epic revolution that will result in a significant proportion of the world's youth entering life with a firm Grip on Reality. None of these youth will be trapped by the black hole that is Woman and thus the overbreeding of the Earth will be stemmed. Those youth whom Totality causes to fail to make the Final Leap will be sufficiently deluded as not to realise the Folly of Employment yet sufficiently Wise as to employ themselves in Spiritually Progressive jobs. Thus will the male womb be devised, and no longer will two year boys suffer the agony of the realisation that they cannot become mothers. When men finally possess the only virtue that women have to offer the world, then will the Great Dream of a feminine-free life advance in the most mighty manner! Already (admittedly deluded) men have devised the inspired mechanism by which we can eliminate unnecessary and unwelcome (which is all of them) female births.

In the fullness of time (which is indeed very short - the Propagation of Wisdom is the most urgent and pressing of all tasks) QRS*T* will reveal their further initiatives. I can for now assure you that these initiatives will be uncompromising in their integrity. The very weakest of insubstantial and vastly separated causal linkages will exist between the fruits of Deluded and Worldly Endeavours and the (voluntarily) contributed funding of these most Spiritual Endeavours.

I hope that I have satisfied you with this answer. I know that it is less specific than you were hoping for but likewise I know that you will trust in the logical necessity of our later announcements. Yes, I know what you are thinking: "this is a politician's answer". All that I can say in response is that QRS*T* are bound by causal principles to divulge information only when the time is most ripe.

Yeah, pray tell. How the fuck are you going to convince people that, you know, suffering isn't bad?

If I were an ordinary man still trapped in the web of illusion I would by now have grown weary of this troll. I will instead offer the following enlightened response to this pitiful creature, in the understanding that my response will assist genuine seekers on their lonely path: there is no need to convince anyone that suffering isn't bad. Suffering is inherently (note: be cautious when using this word: only the true Genius is capable of applying it appropriately) bad; nevertheless it is a cause that has a desirable effect. Now you can see how "inherent" fits into the scheme: that which is a part of causality defies the notion of inherency, so the Genius can justifiably refer to the non-causal ("Absolute" if you will) properties of suffering as "inherently bad", whereas He simultaneously recognises that in the paradigm of cause-and-effect, suffering has "causal benefit". Those who are capable of understandig this dichotomy between inherent and causal properties are indeed far advanced along the path of Spiritual Logic.

I will not respond to the remaining crass insinuations of this child's post.

Haven't you gotten bored yet Laird?

The Total Immersion of the Fully Enlightened Buddha in Ultimate Reality saves Him from Boredom.

Yeah, grow up Laird.

Those who have attained a modicum of Spiritual Wealth will recognise the deep irony of this imperative.

Stop believing yourself.

That this pathetic troll believes that in his delusions of grandeur he can utter commands to a Fully Enlightened Buddha in the expectation that they will even be considered as anything other than sawdust is testimony to the utter foolishness of the majority of the human race. Folly of this nature is of the Utmost Concern to Fully Enlightened Buddhas, and have no doubt: the coming initiatives portend the permanent erasure of Foolish Delusion from the face of the planet.