What about universities and schools, Marsha? Do you believe there should be a complete absence of rules and have anarchy reign? What do you think the result would be if discipline broke down, the atmosphere of learning dissipated and the kids could do whatever they please?
I do think kids should have more freedom than they do now. I do not think kids should be subjected to medical discipline, for instance. I think that kids do need some experience learning that fire burns. I think kids have to be allowed to make mistakes.
Because I have no one else for comparison, I must use my own kids as examples. Having grown up in the Redneck Ghetto, both of them know all about crack and cocaine and alcohol and marijuana. They especially know about crank -- meth.
They know the destruction of it very well.
Some kids will never know about all that and some kids will never have to know about it. Wonderful if you can remain a virgin.
Then, some kids will walk into the fire without knowing how it can burn and they will suffer. They will be prone to all sorts of chemical addictions because they have never been exposed to it. As young adults, many will enjoy the freedom of breaking the stingent rules that they had to obey as children.
Kids have a tendency to rebel against their parents. In some ways, this is healthy but, when there are too many rules or too strict rules, they break bad. Having watched many kids grow up, this breaking of rules in adolescence is interesting to observe.
Often, the wildest kids are those who grew up with strict discipline.
I never had many rules for my kids because I could not enforce them. I was a single mother plus, somehow, I generally had six or seven kids in my home though I was the mother of only two. I often had twenty or more kids.
When limits are not set strictly, kids learn to set their own limits. My daughter regularly stole my car when she was twelve but, by sixteen,
she would never dream of driving illegally. When she was twelve, she took my car when I was asleep and drove over the mountains. She is an excellent driver.
Of course, I do not believe in anarchy. You again try to dismiss me. I do believe in self discipline. Self discipline is not learned through obedience. It is learned through consequence.
Neither of my kids ever responded through "time out" or spankings. When I put either of them in time out, they set their rooms on fire.
I am certainly not against higher education. I think college can be a good thing for self discipline. Often, it is only then that young adults learn that the fire does burn.
I have been friends with many people who were well educated -- PhDs
or Masters graduates. Both of my husbands were well educated -- one with dual masters in Fine Arts and Psychology. The other with a Masters
in Journalism. Sometimes, education can be a calming influence.
But one thing that I have learned is that an asshole is an asshole.
The bitch I encountered yesterday was an educated asshole. But an asshole nevertheless. I rarely get angry at anyone. Plainly, he is accustomed to dealing with bimbos. I do not have a degee of higher
education but I do not fit the bimbo mold and I resent someone trying
to force me into fitting the bimbo mold. I have to work for a living but there are some indignities that I will not suffer, no matter what. At some
point, you just have to stand on your own two feet and say, "Fuck you."
I will not have my intelligence insulted by an asshole. At a certain point,
you have to stand your ground.
When I revolted, he told me that I needed a more positive attitude.
That is code for saying, "You need to be more obedient."
He is not my boss. He is not even employed by my corporation. Yet, he
was telling me and the others what they could and could not do.
My only regret is that I was not more outspoken.
Southern women are very obedient. They get upset by overt confrontation so I try to hold it down some. In the past, I have been more outspoken.
I try to keep my mind and my job separate.
Once in a while, the mind takes over.
I can walk out of there and get another job the same day. I think I may start speaking my mind more often.
Faizi
