BOZO THE CLOWN

[Carl G]

In the true spirit of Worldly Matters ["just say "no" to thinking"], let's have this thread be the ultimate urinal for random free-associations and socio-political trivia!

First up: Why do cops eat donuts?

"I know several cops and I know the answer. There are two parts to the answer. The first part is what everyone thinks, namely that cops like donuts so they eat them. Simple cause and effect relationship."

Read more here:

http://www.webword.com/wp/2004/04/26/wh ... at-donuts/

[Talking Ass]

Hard to compete with that, Carl.

Second Up: This

[DHodges]

First up: Why do cops eat donuts?

Gotta love the comments section on that.

COPS EAT DONUTS BECAUSE THEY ARE FAT PIGS WHO WHEN THEY DIE THEY WILL BURN IN A FIREY DEATH AND ROT IN HELL, AND GET ASS RAPED BY MR 666

[Talking Ass]

Hmmmm. I don't seem to be getting through.

[Carl G]

It's hard to be the most insipid thread on Worldly Matters, but let's keep it up!

Taste Test: Obama Soda A Hit With French Teens

Maria Tudjay, 14, and her friends say they love Obama Soda because it tastes like bubble gum, and that the can is pretty because it's in the colors of the French flag.

"And I'm very proud to drink it, because Obama is such a good example for black people," she says.

[Carl G]

[twitter] Just ate a whole quarter watermelon. Appetizer before dinner. [/twitter]

[Dan Rowden]

It lurks in your sewer.

[Carl G]

Hey, machine gun ringtones for your phone!

[Carl G]

You've been linked to death about Crazy Americans with Guns in that other thread, but what about Crazy Japanese with Gum Flavors? That's sum different fun, Yankee!

http://inventorspot.com/articles/top_te ... _japa_7125

4) Xylish Platinum Mint Chardonnay Flavor - Smell Drunk, Stay Sober

[Ataraxia]

[twitter] Just ate a whole quarter watermelon. Appetizer before dinner. [/twitter]

hahahaha. Twitter is setting unimagined new lows in mans penchant for the banal.

Somehow, Caine dying from auto erotic asphyxiation in a Bangkok hotel, just doesn't seem right. (grasshopper)

[Carl G]

Muslim swimwear. Check it out!

"Modest/Full Coverage Swimwear ~
Total Freedom for the Water Enthusiast™"

The models are vivacious!

[Carl G]

Major News Flash, you heard it here first!

Palin resigns as governor, leaves plans secret

WASILLA, Alaska – Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin surprised supporters Friday and announced she is resigning from office at the end of the month, leaving open the possibility she would seek a run for the White House in 2012.

This is not a joke, repeat, this is not a -- well, it is a joke, but it's for real!

[Carl G]

It's Random Poetry Time!


I cannot speak for all who stem
'Long roads less traveled as their way,
Nor question choices made by them
In days long past or nights long dim
by words they spoke and did not say.

Each road is long, though short it seems,
And credence gives each road a name
Of fantasies sun-drenched in beams
Or choices turned to darkened dreams,
To where each road wends just the same.

From North to South, then back again,
I followed birds like all the rest
Escaping nature's snowy den
On roads I've seen and places been,
Forsaking roads that traveled West.

This journey grows now to its end,
As road reflections lined in chrome
Give way to roads with greater bend
And empty signs that still pretend
They point the way to home sweet home.

But all roads lead to where we go
And where we go is where we've been,
So home is just a word we know,
That space in time most apropos
For where we want to be again.

For even home, it seems to me,
Is still a choice we all must face
From day to day and endlessly,
To choose if home is going to be
Another road - or just a place.

[Carl G]

Joe Biden Thong Underwear!

Wear the U.S. Vice President at crotch level where he belongs!

Made in the U.S.A.

Sorry, no jock straps, guys, so if you were a Biden supporter, too bad, there is no Biden supporter for you.

[Carl G]

Perfect. That is exactly the informative type of post we are looking for on Bozo the Clown.

following the latest Apache developments

Coincidentally I just yesterday finished reading a history of the Apaches, so yeah, right on.

Welcome to the board, yuwasont74.

[Carl G]

From "GOD LIKES BUBBLEGUM POPCORN, A Christian Newsletter Featuring a Variety of Uniqueness!"

Let the Summer Fun Begin

For weeks now, I have been busy planning my summer’s spree of non-activity. Within a matter of time, some strange thought horned in on my serenity. For some reason I hit a snag in my planning. I thought I had everything worked out but I have noticed something strange about this new strategy of mine. That is, it is quite hard to plan to do nothing.

Wait, there's philosophical questions here:

When you do nothing, what exactly are you doing or not doing? Boy, do I need a philosopher today. (Where is Dr. Phil when you really need him?) And I suppose the biggest question is, how do you define nothing?

To define nothing, you have to say something, and something certainly is not nothing. So how do I know when I'm doing nothing? If I do anything, does it cancel out my goal of nothing?

I'm wondering how the great philosopher Dr Phil would respond.

[Carl G]

Can you imagine, Honolulu's Kapi'olani Medical Center won't issue a copy of Obama's birth certificate to any Tom, Dick, or Harry who asks for it?

Not even to Jerome R. Corsi of WorldDreckDaily.

What is this country coming to? I smell conspiracy!

[Carl G]

Daily I scan the length and breadth of the Internet, patrolling tirelessly for the most banal news, for you.

To those who prefer to not think, I salute you.

Keep clicking BOZO THE CLOWN, accept no substitutes.

[Carl G]

Is is overly warm or cold where you are? Is it muggy and mercenary? Are you stressed by excess warfare? Carfare? Well, kick back and return to the good old days of bucolic living and friendly people. My old neck o' the woods, if I do say so myself, is still a mighty fine place, and I just might be getting back soon for a visit.

http://www.ithacamarket.com/
http://ithacabakery.com/pages/home/home.php
http://www.grassrootsfest.org/festival/
http://www.taughannock.com/

[Carl G]

Heh, life is random poetry, misspellings and all. Enjoy.


Life

Life is pain
Life is sorrow
Life is nightmares

Life is love
Life is laughter
Life is sweet dreams

Life is change
Life is loss
Life loosing everything

Life is stability
Life is win
Life is gaining everyone

Life is tears
Life is hurt
Life is grief

Life is smiles
Life is comfort
Life is happiness

Life is loosing
Loved ones

Life is gaining
Yourself

[Carl G]

File this under "Front Page Serious":

When Will the Recovery Begin? Never

By Robert B. Reich (He was secretary of labor in the Clinton administration)

"This economy can't get back on track because the track we were on for years -- featuring flat or declining median wages, mounting consumer debt, and widening insecurity, not to mention increasing carbon in the atmosphere -- simply cannot be sustained."

http://informationclearinghouse.info/article23026.htm


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Thanks for making BOZO THE CLOWN your number one news source at Genius Forums.

[Carl G]

Banal without being bonkers

Over-the-top but never O RLY

Zaftig but not Zaffron

OMG but never oh noes

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BOZO, raddest blog on Matters that matter least.

[Carl G]

What fun!

Obama with a Twist by Balloon Artist Ori Livney

Yes there's a commercial to sit through, but it's totally worth it for the video.

Wait, no it isn't. It's stupid. Don't waste your time. Really, don't look, just know it exists.


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BOZO, informing you 24/7 (and on you, to the government... hah, kidding!)

[DHodges]

The Search for Truth

[Carl G]

Woo, funny stuff, and thanks for that, DHodges!

More humor:

Louis CK - Bill Gates

It's a YouTube snippit I find hilarious. What would you do with 85 billion smackaroonies? Very apropos for these trying economic times. Enjoy!