If you were about to die....

[Dan Rowden]

What would you say and to whom - assuming you had time (i.e. weeks) to write a eulogy? Who would you say you were? What would you say you've done that matters?

[Diebert van Rhijn]

Writing your own eulogy? Is that a good idea? Perhaps one can wonder what others will write or say when that time comes.

But I think I'd write some time capsule, something to open for perhaps one or two family members who are now too young. The reason for it is that I think it's best to have some time between passing and reading what the deceased has to say. Otherwise it might be so "heavy". And I'm pretty sure my writing will be way more relevant and make more sense in the future, like in five or ten years. Another reason for the capsule approach is the personal touch (message in a bottle) and perhaps the insane but enticing gamble that the person might be actually, briefly interested.

The contents will not be some biography but more a personalized, condensed version of some things I found out to be the case. But most important of all I'd always push to question, challenge and doubt everything, most of all themselves. To stress there will be no resting place. Amen.

[Russell Parr]

I can't say what I would do for sure, as I still have too many egotistical ties to relationships, but I like to think I would start by breaking up with my girlfriend, start talking a lot more directly with my family about how their religion is just an extension of their egotism, and teach as many people as possible how to respect each other as individuals and that God is Nature.

As for who I am, I would say I am an introverted kid that grew into someone that learned how to think for himself. I would say that everything about me is caused by nature, and that I am no different from anyone else in this way.

If asked what I have done that matters, I would say that nothing; no action, no event, no 'thing' matters in any ultimate sense. But I would also say the highest points of my existence are the times that I've overcome my egotism and lived for truth.

[ewil]

Well, I wouldn't make it a big issue, but I would compose as many new songs as I want in the time I had and publish everything. I think music is passed on to others better as a message, so why not end with it?

[jupiviv]

Since I would be approaching my own death, I'd probably write extensively about death itself - people's various deluded perceptions of it and the deluded philosophical or mundane by-products of those perceptions. Also, its actual meaning relative to life, that both mean exactly the same thing, i.e, the existence of something and the non-existence of something else.

I'd avoid writing anything strictly personal or anything that sounds like a motto, since that would simply be unnecessary dramatism. Reading a dead man's treatise on death is dramatic enough!

Also, I'd prefer to publish the eulogy *before* I died, since I'd want to see how people are influenced by it.

[Bobo]

I would say that only the self-examined life is worth living, and that's why self-death is made illegal, to further worthless living.

[Diebert van Rhijn]

Also, I'd prefer to publish the eulogy *before* I died, since I'd want to see how people are influenced by it.

Nothing to stop you doing it already! Think of the power of such announcement of your untimely death, the treatise, the mourning, the realizations, etc. You'd have to fake a miraculous come-back or just disappear though. To stay "in character" as it were.

[Cory Duchesne]

What would you say and to whom - assuming you had time (i.e. weeks) to write a eulogy? Who would you say you were? What would you say you've done that matters?

My past is everything I failed to be. I was one of those kids who really was in love with life, but I watched my life go down the toilet as a teenager. Lately I've been fascinated by the distinction between crime and blunder, so to me, everything revolves around describing the problem of embarrassment, criminality, delusion and a love for "the all".

How did my boredom become so externalized...so fixated on people?

My explanation is cupid's arrow: people take shots at your mind. If your spiritual constitution is not at an ideal default of moral fortitude, then any sort of psychological attacks you receive will just compel you to compete with your abuser - on his terms.

It's been said that a woman loves the man who hurts her. Well, I think that's true for most men. Male culture is essentially one of one-upmanship, and if you're not aware of the underlying reasons for it, then you'll be ground into dust, which I was. I died in my own vomit.

So basically that's what I stand for. Getting people to become aware of the fact that they obey Eros. Eros tells you you're unworthy, and you'll try to compete with him. But it's a game you cannot win, because Eros thrives on his own self degradation. If you try to get the better of him, it's only to your own hurt. He's not in it for anything but his own destruction and the shots he takes at your mind just lure you further and further into his game, which is essentially self annihilation.

[Dan Rowden]

Also, I'd prefer to publish the eulogy *before* I died, since I'd want to see how people are influenced by it.

Nothing to stop you doing it already!

Indeed. That statement saves me the trouble of an entire post. Thanks Dieb.

[Pye]

If I were about to die, I'd be talking to myself.

I'd be laying there, perhaps a fat tear or two of gratitude rolling back into my ears, saying to myself:

"You did it. You lived. This was life, and you lived it. This is death, and you meet it.
This is life; you did it; you saw it through . . . . "

[Dan Rowden]

How do you do other than live life? And I'm not referring to suicide in any way. Seems like a funny thing to say to yourself. Seems a bit like captioning the obvious.

[Pye]

Well, yes, I suppose it can sound that way, Dan, but the thing is thusly: no one else will know what-all this "it" has been in that moment. Being with that - with oneself at the end of one's being-in-time - that's the "it" I mean; the only-you-have-known-it-this-way moment, and that it was this that you alone lived. and died.

that better? :)

[Pye]

. . . where one would experience their solitude in life the most, meeting it in this one and only death

[SeekerOfWisdom]

Dan, just saying, if you plan on having your eyes open the whole time waiting around to die, don't. Such a thing will only perpetuate bodily attachment. Reside in a state of meditation and there will be no 'death' to meet. At least that's personally the way I see it and would go about it.

If not, at least keep in mind:
'And one should understand, according to reality, and true wisdom:
"This does not belong to me; this am I not; this is not my Ego."'

[Dan Rowden]

So, the point of the thread sort of went over your head, then?

[Jamesh]

Due to having a plethora of unhealthy habits, I’ve thought about this fleetingly quite a few times, however been leaving the hard thinking to when the doc says – sorry laddie, you’ve got cancer. A massive stroke is also just as likely (my father has had a quadruple bypass and lived healthier than me).

As I’m not emotionally mature enough to deal smoothly with a known death of my self in the near future, I'd probably say to a few people, namely bank tellers.

"Hand Over the Money"

Then I'd go and organise cryogenic storage for my head.

My eulogy would say “IOU”

I'm rather curious about what the world will be like in X 100 years. Not that cryogenics is likely to work anyway.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Other than that imaginary bulldust, my eulogy would probably end up as a ramble of why I’d never really gotten on very well with other people as an adult. He Came, He Saw and He Shat on Everyone :) So I’d be trying to explain my context in the universe relative to those who knew me. While there would be no no-self hoo haa, other than in relation to not being inherent, other things I’ve learnt from this forum would be included.

Or I might not bother – I’ve always thought a good pre-death wake type piss-up with some E’s was all I would want as a sort of eulogy. For some soppiness I’d sing Seasons In The Sun (apparently one of the worst pop songs of all time, but I like it. Still a little boy at heart ).
Providing I had some good days and money, I might be more concerned about doing things I’ve never done, such as taking heroin or hiring a high class pro or skydiving or breaking the office windows of pollies I don’t like or sending a memo out at work lambasting the ego based inanity of most of the managers, etc.

What would you say you've done that matters?

Not creating any offspring. I’ve done a good thing for the world – the human virus seems out of control (and thus the bastards endanger my imagined cryogenic storage –why would they let the dead return in an overpopulated world?).

I also think I’ve learnt to be faithless – to become an individual – things have to make sense to me personally, not what others may say is right or rational.

[SeekerOfWisdom]

Yeah I guess so Dan.

You should record a comedy skit before dying Jamesh :)

[Beingof1]

Great question brother Dan.

When my dad was facing death he did something that all of us who knew him cherish. He wrote two biographies. The first was for his family - recounting our lives together and the memories of what we experienced. He added a special chapter to each member in this book.

The second biography was called "The Miracles I Have Seen." It was an account of his life and ministry.

Both are cherished by me.

Agape Dan

[Pye]

Seeker writes:
Dan, just saying, if you plan on having your eyes open the whole time waiting around to die, don't. Such a thing will only perpetuate bodily attachment. Reside in a state of meditation and there will be no 'death' to meet. At least that's personally the way I see it and would go about it.

If not, at least keep in mind:
'And one should understand, according to reality, and true wisdom:
"This does not belong to me; this am I not; this is not my Ego."'

Dan replies: So, the point of the thread sort of went over your head, then?

Seeker: Yeah I guess so Dan.

I don't know. I think this is just as revelatory of an opportunity to bake-off some ego as any.

[jupiviv]

Think of the power of such announcement of your untimely death, the treatise, the mourning, the realizations, etc.

Unless you're famous, respected and rich(or at least the first), such an announcement in the age of youtube, facebook, craigslist and 4chan would be completely impotent and irrelevant to anyone except your immediate family. I'm not exactly a movie star, controversial media personality or leader of a large cult. My parents, uncles, aunts etc. may be influenced by this, but most probably not towards wisdom.

Besides, you misinterpreted what I meant by wanting to see how people are influenced. I'd just want to see how they react to the actual ideas within it, not to the situation of a terminally ill person publishing an eulogy. In fact, drama and sensationalism of any kind are the last things I'd want to provoke. I'm a more of a Bach than a Mozart person.

[Diebert van Rhijn]

I'd just want to see how they react to the actual ideas within it, not to the situation of a terminally ill person publishing an eulogy.

That's the thing Jup, why would they react differently than they would if you'd show your ideas now? Perhaps you expect more attention to it when there's the event of death attached to the text?

[SeekerOfWisdom]

'And one should understand, according to reality, and true wisdom:
"This does not belong to me; this am I not; this is not my Ego."'

I don't know. I think this is just as revelatory of an opportunity to bake-off some ego as any.

Think what you like Pye, and imagine it as the end of your being-in-time if you like. Though that thought only seems to increase the relevancy of the quote, hence it's repetition.

[Shardrol]

I don't think I want to say or write anything to explain myself or list my accomplishments. That is for others to do - or not. It's not explainable anyway. Twice I've been asked to deliver eulogies at funerals & both times it was just a kind of finger-painting. Things I remembered, things I liked & admired, qualities that stood out to me. But there was so much left out. It's impossible to really sum up a person. We are all too complicated & contradictory. When I used to write fiction & sometimes base the characters on actual people I always found I had to edit out so many parts of them because the whole person was way too big to fit on a page. (Someone like Tolstoy could almost do it though. His characters are so full of minutely nuanced contradictions & seeming irrelevancies that they almost seem like real people.)

What I would like to do instead of vomiting out more words would be to find a place to be near the ocean, where I could crank my hospital bed up enough to see it & just let my thoughts/feelings/ideas/whatever arise & dissolve like the waves.

[jupiviv]

I'd just want to see how they react to the actual ideas within it, not to the situation of a terminally ill person publishing an eulogy.

That's the thing Jup, why would they react differently than they would if you'd show your ideas now? Perhaps you expect more attention to it when there's the event of death attached to the text?

They may try to reason about it in earnest if they knew I'd die soon, which they may not if I walked up to them now and started discussing it with them.

Death would probably be the thing most on my mind as I approached my own death, so that's why I'd probably write about death rather than, say, the global economy.

[Dennis Mahar]

Why don't you think about thinking.

Death as a category 'otherness'
Like you put woman as a category 'otherness'.
Self and 'otherness' is like a rampaging bull around here.

Reification.